DEAR ERIC: I am fortunate to be part of a large family. As expected, however, we have a variety of political opinions. One of my brothers-in-law seems to feel it is appropriate to display his political views at family events. I do not want any displays of politics at this event. Should I include on invitations a note stating that political attire of any kind is not welcome?
– No Politics Party
DEAR PARTY: It’s a fine idea to include dress code instructions on party invitations, including a moratorium on political statements, but in this case, it runs the risk of being read for what it is: a pointed edict for an audience of one.
Better to reach out to him directly and ask him not to wear something that invites political discussion to your party. Now, of course, he can decline. Depending on what he’s planning on wearing and what you think might happen as a result, you can decide if this is not the gathering for him.
Sometimes political attire is in the eye of the beholder. (If you really want to go down the fashion rabbit hole, everything that we wear makes some sort of statement. That’s one of the points of fashion.) But we can also all agree that some items are worn to provoke a response. If that’s the case with this relative, having a discussion with him about what response he’s looking to get from your friends and family and why is a good start.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)
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